The folks at Jezebel have covered this nicely, mostly focusing on whether the firing was actually a judgment of the worker's lifestyle. I'm not sure if the employer was actually concerned with PR or was just freaked out by the worker's sex life, and I'm not sure it matters that much.

I don't want to freak folks out, but it almost goes without saying that anything posted online or sent in an email has the potential to be made public. Between Facebook's ever changing privacy policies, occasional accidental public revelations of users' private data, the proliferation of hackers, and people's terrible password choices, it doesn't seem that anything online can ever been absolutely secure or private.

Our current moment in time may one day be recalled by history ebooks (or even nano-mind-books) as 'the age of the internet' but perhaps it will be recalled as 'the great coming out'. Queer folks are coming out voluntarily more than ever, and the sex secrets of mostly straight politician are also been pulled (less voluntarily) into the open, and if the secrets of everyday folks are at risk of exposure too, well, they can't fire all of us for having a sex life, can they?

In all seriousness, these porn star PSA-style video features some of our favourite porn stars (from Joanna Angel to Ron Jeremy, but alas, no Belladonna) speaking out against the downloading of pirated porn. Put together by the Free Speech Coalition in the US, their message is essentially identical to the arguments put forward by the music industry over and by the cable/satellite providers in the pre-internet era.

As a retailer, it feels like we should be vehemently against the pirating of porn, but the ethical arguments are complicated, and it seems that there is a tangible different between theft (i.e. taking an item from someone, thus depriving them of that item) and copying (i.e. taking an item from someone, but not depriving them of that item). However, it is also easy to argue that copying deprives the creator (usually of money).  If this is the argument the porn industry wants to rest on, they should also be speaking out against DVD rentals which similarly deprive the creator or producer of the funds that would be generated by a straight out sale of the DVD.

In any case, whether or not you think that downloading pirated porn is right or wrong, the porn industry is uniquely positioned in this fight. Porn popularized VHS back in the day (and DVDs more recently) mostly due to the ease with which one could copy porn illegally, but also because of the proliferation of adult video rental shops. Porn and sex most certainly played a huge role in popularizing the internet too, so it is odd to see the porn industry coming down hard on the media it basically created and popularized.

Watch the Free Speech Coalition videos. Via Wired

Lust, daydreams, voyeurism, self-defense and period stains; Fishnets, dazed pigeons and the ever-revered bushy mons all come together in a spicy stew of vivid colours, layering the glitter and grime of our city lives. Indelible Femme lays out all the sass, lumps, bedroom eyes and megaphone-moans for your eyes only, rendered in a mixture of acrylic, oil pastel, collage and sequins.

June 1 - June 30
Art Opening: June 3, 2010, 7 - 9pm.

July 1 - July 31.
Art Opening July 15, 7pm - 9pm.

Regardless of how you feel about Middle East politics generally, this is an incredible discussion to be happening at Pride Toronto this year. There's no debate that Pride began as a political act and Pride celebrations in North America and across the world absolutely have activist origins, but the political nature of Pride here in Toronto has been systematically swept away in favour of the big gay party we're familiar with. The interesting part to me is that anyone was surprised that Pride has become apolitical. The exciting part is that folks are now opening questioning and challenging Pride's mandate.

Like many communities who've experienced a great deal of oppression and discrimination, there has often been pressure to quiet down the dissenters within the community to present a unified front against oppression. The open dissent against Pride Toronto suggests to me that queers (at least in Toronto) have settled into the basic rights that have been won over the past four decades, and are now ready to challenge each other and the world.

If Pride wants to be an apolitical organization, that's just fine! There's nothing wrong with throwing a giant gay party once a year - but call it what it is: a party. If folks want Toronto Pride to be political again, they'll have to drop the fancy sponsors and their thick, uh, wallets.

Art opening party: Thursday, June 10th, 2010, 7-11pm
The Raging Spoon (761 Queen St West)
Come see, celebrate, and raise a glass. DJ Dreidel spins all evening.

Exhibit runs through July.

View more images on [Facebook]

We're now also distributing the binders we've been collecting. All of our binder bucks binders are clean and wearable pre-loved binders. Each pre-loved binder costs $5 and goes to subsidize the collection of more used binders for other folks who need them! Our collection is small, but we have a good range of sizes available.

But for any of us who live long enough, being a senior citizen and being sexual isn't a fad, it's a reality. Our sexuality doesn't stop or change because we are getting older. Our sexuality changes, but it does that throughout our lives.

The biggest change when it comes to aging and sex may not be how our body responds differently, or how we think and feel, it may be the way we are treated by everyone around us, and the ways our access to partners change as we get older.

It's hard not to sound glib about sex and aging bodies. The fact is that as we age we do have to learn to adapt to our changing bodies, it isn't all "embrace your inner wisdom" and "spend all that free time having sex". Although both of those sound pretty good if you can make it work.

The bottom line is that changing and adapting isn't necessarily easy but it is possible and can result in both great sex and greater self knowledge.

Read more about Chris Ablett or view his collection "Sitting" on Chris' website.

We've been working hard to bring you a more frequent, relevant and easy-to-read guide to the goings on at Come As You Are - and we hope you'll love the new format as much as we do!

Here's what you can expect from our new newsletter:

Be Accessible: We've increased our font size and changed our font to the easier-to-read, and appropriately named VAG. Working Harder to Make Sex Easier: We'll now be publishing this newsletter monthly to keep the information fresh and to ensure you hear about new toys, books and DVDs as soon as they hit the shelves.

Contribute Co-operatively: We'll be frank: a paper newsletter isn't he most environmentally responsible form of communication. In 2006, we nudged almost 5000 of our newsletter subscribers off of lettermail and onto email and we promise to keep on nudging.

Create Nerdy Fun: We've produced this entire newsletter in-house: we designed, wrote, printed and folded this newsletter ourselves. Sometimes we just create a whole lot of nerdy work, but fortunately, we think it Is a whole lot of nerdy fun!

In other news, we're both happy and sad to announce that there have been some other big changes at Come As You Are co-operative.

Founding member, Cory Silverberg has recently left the membership of the co-operative after 13 years of dedicated service to pursue his interest in collecting Foursquare badges, and Sarah Forbes-Roberts will be on parental leave to raise our collective spawn.

We're half-joking about both, of course, but we'll miss them both terribly and are so appreciative that they've entrusted us with running this great co-op for all of you!

No, you're not going to find a link to purchase this title on our website. It's just not going to happen.  But since my job involves reviewing ALL the porn that's out there, I feel I have to share some of the worst titles with you...just so you know what you're missing :)

If you aren’t familiar with the expression, it basically means someone with an ass so sexy that it makes you cry. Get it, onions, crying… yeah. Fucking fantastic.

I might find it hard to work into my everyday vocab. Maybe I’ll try it on a stranger…

There’s some bad, bad, titles for porn out there. I know it better than a lot of people. Well, maybe if you frequent sketchy porn shops, I’m sure you’ve seen a few horrible ones indiscriminately scattered amongst the shelves. I just don’t know what appeal this holds. Obviously, it works for some people. I find it pretty disgusting. What does the title literally mean, “stop fucking me”? That’s typically not what gets viewers off. Oh well.

A few years back we started working with ORAD, the Ontario Rainbow Alliance of the Deaf on a few projects. It's been great, one of our joint events was actually one of my favourite events we've done in 12 years. It's made me want to keep going with my signing (I stalled at level 301).

And I was excited to get this invitation to this workshop put on by the ASL & Literacy Instructor Students at Geogre Brown. It's a free event and a great way to find out more about ASL and why you should learn it.

Here are the deets:

George Brown College
200 King St. E., St. James Campus
Adelaide building - SJC, Room 406
September 30, 2009, 6pm to 8pm

In some versions of this classic song, the last day is also for “true love”. Our suggestion for today isn’t something you buy at all. It’s just that you spend some time today, and hopefully over the rest of the holidays, doing something to take care of yourself and give yourself a little bit of pleasure, however you define it. The holidays aren’t always a time we remember to take care of ourselves, but taking time out of your day to show yourself a little love and pleasure can go a long way toward making the holiday season more manageable.

Happy holidays from all of us at Come As You Are!

We weren’t the ones to come up with the term “prostate milking”, but we couldn’t pass up a double entendre like this one. Forget about the g-spot analogies, the prostate is a unique pleasure centre for many men, and these prostate massagers were built for the job, and built to last.
Prostate Massagers

This one’s almost too easy. We’re not sure you need five golden cock rings (unless you have five fellas on your shopping list) but rings can offer men a completely unique way of experiencing sex and rediscovering their genitals. Ring in the holidays right.

Penis Rings

When you work in retail it’s impossible not to get every holiday song stuck in your head at least once. The 12 Days of Christmas is a particularly pernicious one, so we decided to stop fighting it and make it our own. If you’re thinking of doing a little sex toy shopping over Christmas or the holidays, and you’re not sure where to start, let the 12 Days of Sex Toys be your guide.

We couldn’t decide which Calling All Angels song to reference here (Train, Lenny, or a little CanCon Jane Siberry?), but the point is that these calling birds are clearly calling out for one angel in particular, the Earth Angel. And why not, it’s a vibrator that cares as much about the planet as it does about your pleasure. Birds love it, we think you will too.

Earth Angel

When you work in retail it’s impossible not to get every holiday song stuck in your head at least once. The 12 Days of Christmas is a particularly pernicious one, so we decided to stop fighting it and make it our own. If you’re thinking of doing a little sex toy shopping over Christmas or the holidays, and you’re not sure where to start, let the 12 Days of Sex Toys be your guide.

If we had to choose the single greatest, yet possibly the simplest, innovation in sex toys over the past twenty years, we’d have to choose the waterproofing of vibrators. Waterproof sex toys are always a better choice, they’re easier to clean, more difficult to break, and you can use them in the snow!

Waterproof Sex Toys

All these geese getting laid got us thinking--if your goal is specifically to get laid, as opposed to just feeling sexual pleasure or getting turned on--what would we recommend? Since getting laid to us means sex with at least one other person, we’d have to go with our library of books written for two or more people. There’s no guarantee they’ll get you there, but if you get yourself there, they’ll help with what to do next!
Sex Books for Two or More

Nothing keeps those cheeks rosy in the winter like a little playful percussive love (aka flogging, spanking, caning, whipping). Check out our selection of pleasure implements that will help you set the rhythm of your passion all year long.

Floggers, Paddles, and Crops

When you work in retail it’s impossible not to get every holiday song stuck in your head at least once. The 12 Days of Christmas is a particularly pernicious one, so we decided to stop fighting it and make it our own. If you’re thinking of doing a little sex toy shopping over Christmas or the holidays, and you’re not sure where to start, let the 12 Days of Sex Toys be your guide.

Migrate away from heteronormativity (because turtle doves migrate…get it?) and surprise the man in your life with a turning of the tables. Also known as Bend Over Boyfriend or pegging, more and more straight-identified guys are discovering the pleasures of being penetrated by their female partners. Let your fears fly away and glide into this comfy harness and dildo set designed just for this kind of play.

Bend Over Beginner Kit

When you work in retail it’s impossible not to get every holiday song stuck in your head at least once. The 12 Days of Christmas is a particularly pernicious one, so we decided to stop fighting it and make it our own. If you’re thinking of doing a little sex toy shopping over Christmas or the holidays, and you’re not sure where to start, let the 12 Days of Sex Toys be your guide.

Domesticated or not, we know how French hens love their independent cinema, and we know if they could watch porn, they’d be clucking their way through the ever growing genre of alt and indie porn. Satisfy your craving for something different...

Alternative and Indie Porn

With all the erecting activity our products inspire, sometimes we feel like we should be wearing hard hats to work.  We don't have one favourite way to our lover's pipes a-piping, but we want to single out the impressive number of educational books and videos that offer oral sex tips, guaranteed to arouse and engorge genitals of all styles.
Oral Sex DVDs and Oral Sex Books

Dance to the beat of your own choosing with OhMiBod’s innovative vibrators, powered by music. Their newest toy, the Freestyle, is the first wireless music massager, dance, and orgasm cord-free at home, at the clubs, or, if you want to live dangerously, at your office holiday party.

OhMiBod: Music Directed Vibration

Our anal sex toys are exciting enough to inspire a hop, skip, and maybe jump. But add a little vibration your favourite butt plug, prostate massager, or dildo, and we promise your lord will be a-leaping with delight. 
Vibrating Anal Toys

Midnight Mayhem Tonight!
Put some air in your tires and a spring in your step because it's time for inventory spring cleaning!

Join us in-store for great deals and hourly giveaways or come score in our infamous toonie toy bin while DJ Winnie spins jams till midnight.

Experience mayhem online with 15% off all sex toys and DVDs all weekend long! Be sure to check out our Doin' it Daily sale for great deals every day!.

The MIDNIGHT MAYHEM event is March 26th between 9pm - 12am in our fully wheelchair accessible store at 701 Queen Street West.

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal:
Bondage Tape
Let your imagination loose with this incredibly versatile toy. 30' feet of re-useable tape that sticks to itself but not to you. Great for anyone who has a hard time with knots, and it looks sexy too! | more info about Bondage Tape

Regular price: $12
Doin' it Daily Deal: $7

Whether that’s a good move or not, we’re happy to help, and we want to encourage you to do the same. Which is why we’re offering a weekly draw for great prizes, available only to people who take a few minutes to add their review to our site.

Here’s how it works.

1. First, you need to create an account for yourself on comeasyouare.com. That part is easy, just click “register” in the top right corner of the site and follow the instructions.

2. Next, make sure you’re logged on (you know you’re logged on because you’ll see your user name in the top right corner).

3. Now you’re ready to review. Just navigate to a toy, book, or DVD you’ve used, read, or watched, click the “more” button to get to the product page, and enter your review. 

Every review gets you a chance to win. There’s no limit to the number of products you can review, and the more you review, the greater your chances are of winning the weekly draw.

Start reviewing!

Edited by Teresa Theophano, LMSW

Headcase will be an anthology comprised of 15-20 nonfiction pieces by writers and artists both established and new, exploring the theme of mental health, mental illness, and mental health care in the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer or questioning (LGBTQ) community. The book is currently being considered for publication by a major queer press. ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-for-proposals-32nd-annual-guelph-sexuality-conference/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-for-proposals-32nd-annual-guelph-sexuality-conference/#comments 4FFF1355-1517-0AA5-6428FAB36C0E2682 Wed, 02 Dec 2009 00:00:00 -0400

The Guelph Sexuality Conference is the longest running and largest sexual health conference in Canada.  The call for next years conference is out, the theme is "Communication and Sexual Health: More than Words".

For the past three years Come As You Are has been proud to sponsor the conference and we're planning on being back again this year.  If you work in sexual health check out the call and think about submitting a proposal.  And don't forget to mark your calendar for June 21-23, 2010.

Guelph Sexuality Conference Request for Proposals
]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-out-for-models-for-a-pap-campaign-for-trans-men/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-out-for-models-for-a-pap-campaign-for-trans-men/#comments 7CD36E3B-1517-0AA5-64FBDE4C812D0DF1 Thu, 22 Oct 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Call Out for Models for a Pap Campaign for Trans Men
 
Many of us have been told that we don’t need Pap tests, or we avoid them because of discomfort and discrimination. In fact, we all need and have a right to Pap tests, which lower our risk of cervical cancer, a disease that can be largely prevented by getting regular Pap tests.
 
We want to let trans men know that we DO need Pap tests, and that there are ways to make getting them easier. We have a right to protect ourselves and each other and we deserve to get Pap tests in a way that honours and respects our needs, our identities and our sexual practices. We need your help in getting this message out there to communities of trans men and healthcare providers in Toronto and across Ontario.
 
Who are we?
 
The Trans Men’s Pap Campaign is a project of Sherbourne Health Centre, guided by a Reference Group made up of trans men and allies who work as health care providers and advocates for our communities.
 
The Call Out:
 
The Campaign is looking for models for a campaign that we are developing for trans men to raise awareness about Pap tests. The campaign will be launched in December 2009.
 
Photos will be used on printed materials, like posters and postcards that will be used at community events throughout the year and beyond, and will also appear on the campaign website. Campaign materials and images will also be distributed throughout the province of Ontario.
 
Model Requirements:

We need approximately 8 trans men to make this campaign rock by modeling for the photos we’ll use in our materials. We would also like to include some images of trans men with their partners (of any gender), so if there is someone in your life who would like to model with you please send their name and photo as well.
 
We’re looking for a diverse group of guys, in terms of  identity, gender presentation, sexual orientation, stage of transition, age, body size, dis/ability, race, and ethnicity.
 
Poses require that your face, or part of your face, and your body be shown. You will be fully dressed, in clothing of your choice.
 
Photographs will be taken in a comfortable environment with a professional photographer who will make sure you feel relaxed and have a good time.

When:

The photo shoot will take place in downtown Toronto in a wheelchair accessible location in November 2009. The photo sessions will last approximately 2 hours. A $50 honorarium will be provided. Only people selected to model for the campaign will be contacted.

Please send a headshot and/or full body shot and a paragraph (with contact info) describing your interest, and general availability no later than 5pm on Thursday November 5, 2009 to:  tmen.pap@gmail.com.

Discretion and confidentiality of submitted material is assured. ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-out-for-trans-conference-in-peterborough-ontario/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/call-out-for-trans-conference-in-peterborough-ontario/#comments 237B7487-1517-0AA5-64C5CA95871B28D9 Tue, 12 Jan 2010 00:00:00 -0400
***
Bodies of Dissent: Transform
March 12-14th, Peterborough, ON

***

Transmission, the organizers of last year’s Bodies of Dissent: TransAccess conference, invite trans and gender variant communities, individuals and allies to submit proposals for workshops and presentations of various forms for the upcoming Trans conference.

Bodies of Dissent: TransForm will be focused on developing strategies and networks to change individuals, communities, organizations and systems. We are issuing a call to action to unite to build communities of empowerment and change.

Please send a proposal outlining the nature of your workshop, presentation or creative project specifying the topic or focus, as well as any materials and/or accommodations required. Workshops, presentation, films and creative projects will be happening during March 12th and 13th, accompanied by performances in the evenings. Interested performers are also encouraged to contact us.

E-mail bodiesofdissent@gmail.com with Proposals, Ideas, Questions

** Proposals are due Monday, January 18th **

--
Transmission Peterborough is dedicated to creating and maintaining a positive Trans presence in the Peterborough community by creating safe and accessible space for Trans and gender-variant people through education and awareness initiatives. With increased visibility, we hope to create a more Trans-friendly environment so that Trans and gender-variant people can have a dignified experience. ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/canadian-citizenship-minister-edits-gay-rights-out-of-guide/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/canadian-citizenship-minister-edits-gay-rights-out-of-guide/#comments 24D30402-F296-D24D-756A0F554249B762 Wed, 03 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0400 Candian Citizenship study guide. New Democratic Critic for Citizenship and Immigration Olivia Chow is quoted in a prepared release:

The Venus show is both a consumer show and a business-to-business trade show. This means that some parts of the show are visitable by anyone, and there are other areas reserved for industry 'professionals'. The Venus show is in its 13th year, and I've been warned by other folks in the 'industry' that it is incredibly wild in comparison to North American trade shows, and I really didn't know what to expect.

My first pleasant surprise was actually in my hotel minibar where I discovered a pickle-in-a-can with self-contained pickle spear. Brilliant.

Once I arrived at the show, I noticed two big differences between the shows I've attended at North American venues and the Venus show in Berlin.

Similar to the Everything To Do With Sex Show in Toronto and other cities, there is a combination of sex retail (sex toys, dvds, books, etc) and stages set up for live sexy shows. In Toronto, these tend to be pretty softcore - lingerie shows, sexy dancing, etc. In Berlin at Venus, the stage shows were full-on stripping and on the consumer floor, web-companies had smaller stages with full-nudity, lots of sex toys, and super explicit action. Comparitively, Toronto is a tease.

On the trade side, Venus was also very different from the shows I've been to in the U.S. Visiting the booths of sex toy makers at Venus often felt like I was peeking into the future of sex toys. I saw so many sexy and innovative toys - some about to be released, some a year away from production still - from so many interesting and independent sex toy makers. In the U.S. when I visit booths from some of the big, old, mainstream sex toy manufacturers, I feel like I'm looking into the past of sex toys.

There are awesome toys (books and dvds!) coming out of North America - they just tend to be from the smaller or independent sex toy inventors.  In fact, perhaps the biggest difference was the number of independent manufacturers from all over the world presenting at Venus. 

 The Docker's khaki pants ad (yes, khakis of all things) attempts to evoke some sort of nostalgic reminiscing of those 'lost days' when patriarchy ruled supreme –“men took charge because that's what they did". According to Dockers, the threat to their glorious rule is not women (though now women are stuck with the chief challenge of opening their own doors), but rather androgyny, non-fat lattes and salad. Who knew a healthy diet had such influence?! 

The problem, as they see it, with this "genderless society" (a feat I myself thought we were an awfully long way from accomplishing), is that "the world sits idly by as cities crumble". Why is it that I don't think the advertisers are referencing Port-au-Prince or Concepcion? Yet, what seems like propaganda intended to make young men join the army is instead a call to khakis. Soft, light pants that stain if you get them dirty. This makes me smile and recall ... the rising of the woman is the rising of us all!

Happy (belated) International Women's Day!
(First image - Cover page of newspaper taken out as ad space. Second image - Inside front cover full-page ad and original front cover. Third image - text from "man shaped" ad)

Celebrity Lezbian Fist is a limited edition series of silicone fists cast from the actual hands of famed and favourite queer cultural icons. The series includes fists by Harmony Hammond, GB Jones, Eileen Myles, Cheryl Dunye, Cathy Opie, Jack Halberstam, and Savoy Kapow Howe. Inspired by the infamous cock-castings by rock groupie Cynthia Plaster Caster, the fists come in a range of punchy colours personally selected by each participant. Each "model" was made in a limited edition of 25. These celebrity fists are mostly art, but are made of 100% silicone and are use-able. Made with love in Canada by Happy Valley and Paige Gratland.

Special thanks to the celebrities behind the fists for the bios below!

Harmony Hammond

Harmony Hammond is an artist, art writer and independent curator who lives and works in Galisteo, New Mexico. Considered a pioneer of the feminist art movement, she lectures, writes and publishes extensively on feminist art, lesbian art, and the cultural representation of difference.

Hammond's work is in the permanent collections of many museums including the Metropolitan Museum of Art, NYC; the Museum of Modern Art, NYC; the Walker Art Center, Mpls., MN; the Brooklyn Museum; the National Museum of Women in the Arts, Washington, DC; the Art Institute of Chicago; the Phoenix Art Museum; the New Mexico Museum of Fine Arts, Santa FE, NM; and the Wadsworth Atheneum, Hartford, CN.

Her book Wrappings: Essays on Feminism, Art & the Martial Arts (TSL Press,1984), a classic on 70s feminist art, is out-of-print. Her ground-breaking book Lesbian Art in America: A Contemporary History (Rizzoli, 2000) received a Lambda Literary Award.

GB Jones

G.B. Jones is an openly queer, self-made in the punk rock tradition, artist, film maker, rock musician, writer and publisher of zines. The writer Kevin Killian asked, "If we call G.B. Jones the 'female Tom of Finland,' what doe' that say about the American fantasy of unlimited sex, power, and class privilege both artists satirize and pull apart?"

G.B. Jones has an uneasy fascination with authority and uses her gender and sexual preference to exploit fantasies of rock & roll, sex, groupies, booze, drugs, money, leather, torn jeans,motorcycles and stardom as an all out assault against values that would strive for assimilation of queer culture into the mainstream. She's every queer girl and boy's hero, whether you want her to be or not. Believe it or don't, she is looking out for every queer's best interests.

Eileen Myles

Eileen Myles was born in Boston in 1949, attended catholic schools in Arlington, Mass. and graduated from UMass (Boston) in 1971. She came to New York in 1974 to be a poet. Since then she's become widely known in writing circles, art circles, queer circles and beyond as one of the most restless interpreters of the American vernacular, moving fluidly from the poetry to writing novels, essays and plays, art reviews, performances and libretti, and perhaps most notably as someone with an uncanny knack as John Ashbery put it, for making people feel uncomfortable and awake=85chanting softlyand beautifully the harsh if humorous realities that combine to make whatever life a poet can piece together today.

Eileen will be touring the Iceland book widely in this fall in North America, Iceland and Europe. She's toured with Sister Spit in 1997 and in 2007 and looks forward to more. She is a Professor Emeritus of writing & Literature at UC San Diego where she taught from 2002 to 2007. In Spring 2010 she will be the Hugo Writer at U. of Montana in Missoula. She contributes to a wide number of publications including Parkett, The Believer, Vice, Cabinet, The Nation, Art Forum, TimeOut, Book Forum and Another Magazine. She received an Andy Warhol/Creative Capital art writers' grant for Iceland. She will be blogging bi-weekly on the Harriet site for the Poetry Foundation till the end of September. She lives in New York.

Cheryl Dunye

Cheryl Dunye is a director, screenwriter, and filmmaker whose work explores issues of race, class, gender, and sexual orientation.

Her work is characteristically postmodern in the self-referential disclosing of Dunye's role as both actor and director. Combining intensely personal accounts with humor, Dunye's films and videos are engaging and provocative, revealing the complexities and struggles she has faced, as well as her happiness and pride, in being an African-American lesbian.

Cheryl Dunye, who graduated with an MFA from Rutgers University, has been a video art practitioner for well over a decade, making such pieces as She Don't Fade, Vanilla Sex, The Potluck and the Passion, and Greetings from Africa.

Cathy Opie

Catherine Opie was born in 1961 in Ohio. She received her MFA from CalArts in 1988. Her solo exhibitions include LA Freeways (San Francisco) and Being and Having (New York). Her work has appeared in group exhibitions from Pari' to Australia to New Orleans, including the 1995 Whitney Museum Biennial in New York and In a Different Light at the University Art Museum in Berkeley in 1995. She lives in Los Angeles and is on the staff of the University of California, Irvine.

In the late eighties to mid-nineties Opie gained national attention for her large format portraits of dyke daddies, gay male performance transvestites, FTM transexuals, tattooed and scarified gay men and lesbians and other members of a social milieu where sexual identity is most dramatically thrown into question. In a non-confrontational manner, Opie's places her subjects clearly and calmly in the center of focus. Her subjects appear to reverse the gaze--outwardly toward the viewer.

Jack Halberstam

Judith Jack Halberstam is Professor of English and Director of The Center for Feminist Research at USC. Halberstam teaches courses in queer studies, gender theory, art, literature and film.

Halberstam is the author of Female Masculinity, The Drag King Book, Skin Shows: Gothic Horror and the Technology of Monsters and a new book from NYU Press titled In a Queer Time and Place: Transgender Bodies, Subcultural Lives.es, gender theory, art, literature and film.

Savoy Howe

Savoy Howe founded the Toronto Newsgirls Boxing Club in 1996.

Savoy started boxing at the Toronto Newsboys Boxing Club at Broadview and Eastern in 1992. At that time there were few females in the boxing gym. After training for a year Savoy participated in the first sanctioned bout for women organized by Toronto in 1993. Wearing the Toronto Newsboys t-shirt in competition, Savoy decided that one day she would fight wearing a Toronto Newsgirls t-shirt.

In 1996 when the Toronto Newsboys moved to the corner of Queen and Greenwood and became the Unitas Boxing Club, named after the Newsboys founder, Tony Unitas, Savoy started teaching as a way of supplementing income so she could keep training. She put up posters weekly to advertise the women=EF=BF?s boxing program and within a short time 40 women signed up. Thus began the Toronto Newsgirls Boxing Club.

Savoy Kapow! Howe has been honoured with the individual/community award for accomplishments in the calendar years 2005 and 2006. Three individuals and three organizations will be honoured. These awards recognize exceptional achievements that break through traditional barriers and pave the way for girls and women to participate in sports and physical activity at every level.

Savoy has also been honoured with an award from Pride Toronto recognizing outstanding contributions that have made an extraordinary impact on the quality of human experience within the queer community over the last year.

Since anyone who deals with advertising knows that the TTC is one of the most conservative ad vendors it’s clear that this was a stunt from the beginning to get the website free publicity for being publicly censored. So if you believe that success is measured in dollars and uncritical eyeballs then you’d have to say bravo to the ad agency who came up with the idea. 

But if your standards for living a decent, thoughtful or dare I say ethical life are a little bit more substantial the whole thing is just sad and it also seems counter intuitive to a long run business strategy.

Why is it sad? It’s sad because this site isn’t actually about helping people explore healthy sexual or relational experiences. It’s about “infidelity” and cheating, which by definition involve deception and lies. The ad that they claim they wanted to run read “Life is short…have an affair”. But since the affair they are referencing explicitly includes lying about it, the ad should just read “Life is short…lie to someone”. And why anyone would want to defend someone’s right to lie in a situation where telling the truth poses no observable danger, I can’t imagine.

In their publicity materials and interviews the website does a great job of using neo-liberal ideology to suggest that cheating is a kind of personal empowerment that only “the man” would want to take away from you. They position themselves as social radicals. What they really are are financial opportunists. 

I hope it goes without saying that being a member of a sex store worker co-op means that I have no problem with sex. I’m all for people having any kind of consensual sex they want. I’m also not particularly judgmental of individuals who find themselves deceiving people they love. I’ve done it (although not about sex) and I think most of us do it at some point in our lives. But doing it or not judging those who do it is not the same thing as encouraging people to do it, and glamorizing it. It’s also not the same thing as equating cheating with “non family values”. If you know anything about the real lives of families you know that cheating is often there in the mix. It may not be ideal, but the construction of a perfect family is no more helpful than the construction of an empowered sexuality that is based on lies and deception.

As for the business plan, the website in question is privately owned so there’s no way of knowing how successful they are or how desperate they are. Compare their Alexa stats to other dating websites and they don’t look so hot. And I’m not sure that their efforts to get mainstream media attention are the way to go. You’d think the cheating business would be one that trades in discretion. I know that if I wanted to have sex with a stranger and I was in a monogamous relationship I wouldn’t go to the cheating website I know that myself, my partner, all my neighbors, and my entire office, just heard about on the radio. I’d probably look for more of a boutique cheating website (one that wasn’t featured on The View and Ellen, one that wasn’t collecting all my personal information and selling it to market researchers). Is this a business that benefits in the long run from that kind of publicity?

Of course how interested in long term growth could a company whose services are almost guaranteed to make their customers unhappy in the long run, really be?

Halloweiner: Friday the Fuckteenth. It might be a little bit off-season, but I found this gem around October of last year, and I think that it was just something about the title that I found appealed to my weird sense of humour. I mean, even parody porn titles and funny porn have titles that can still be in the least bit sexy (ok, so not in every case, but whatever). I guess they’re trying to play into the “fuck-teen” element. But Halloweiner just gets me every time. Brilliant.

I Was Tight Yesterday might be a familiar series to those in the porn world, but…volume 7 has taken it that much further with adding this to the front box cover: “When the Brothas’ are Done, You’ll Need a 2x4 Strapped to Your Ass So You Don’t Fall In!” (note the fancy, fancy grammar and capitalization). Who is going to fall in where? A penis is going to fall into her vagina/ass unless it has a piece of wood attached to its butt? It conjures up some strange imagery for me. Why blast that across the front cover? I reckon it’s probably better not to ask.

Old Enough for Porn, Too Young to Drink. Depending on where these girls are from, the casting dudes have a very narrow window in which to scout talent…In QC, AB, and MB, this phenomenon of being (legally) able to do porn and (legally) able to drink is nonexistent. But I guess they are American. Still, it’s funny. The title itself makes me think that if you’re old enough to do one, you should be old enough to do the other. Luckily I’m legal to do both.

This one just struck me as funny. I’ve always wondered what was so attractive about women who were extremely flexible and why this was a directly sexual thing. If one is flexible, there’s immediately an undertone that points directly to how good they might be at having sex, and I’d even go so far as to say that it makes that person out to be more of a sexual object than a person that might be able to accommodate many positions. Truthfully, I’m not exactly sure how pleasurable a lot of these positions would be for either partner, but then again, I don’t necessarily identify as one that has a ‘flexibility fetish’, as you might have deduced from this post.

Whatever, it’s funny and I like it. The Bendy Broads box cover gets a thumbs up from me!

It does the job though - it definitely is a clever title. Can't speak for the content though.

Snort that Cum. I’m finding it a little tough to come up with something to say about this. Maybe it’s just that there’s too much to say about it. In my mind, I’m equally appalled and intrigued, and I also find it a bit funny. Funny how? Cause the penis placed on the plate beside the blonde looks a little to me like an animal stopping at a lake to quench its thirst. I’m assuming it’s placed there to provide something for the ‘starlet’ to ‘snort’, but I don’t see it that way. And how healthy is it to put a semi-liquid (?) material up your nose? I read another porn review’s thoughts about this film (they had actually watched it), and they had mentioned that it would probably be much easier to achieve the…uhh…desired results if a straw had been employed instead of dollar bills, but let’s not get too picky here. What an industry.  

This website emailed me to suggest a link exchange, which I didn’t respond to, but found they had put www.comeasyouare.com up on their site anyway. I doubt we’re going to get much increased traffic from this exposure, but oh well. I can tell you that our values are definitely nowhere even close to being in line with theirs.

I’m also missing the whole point of this website. I’m guessing it might be some type of vessel for something else, I’m not really that internet smart. But it did provide me with a couple minutes of hilarious reading.

The Sexual and Gender Identity Disorders Work Group recently put up a web page that lists all the proposed additions, deletions, and revisions in the area of sex and gender.

As you’d expect from a process where more than half of those who are involved have ties to the drug industry, the proposals are good for Big Pharma and also for researchers, not so good for the rest of us (and honestly, not so good for the individuals who work in research and pharma, since they have sex too, and they will be as badly damaged by the DSM-5 as any of us...only they'll have more money for lawyers and press agents).

Come As You Are is getting involved in setting up some public discussions about the DSM revisions and what they mean to the construction of sexuality and gender, but for now I just want to share one of the proposed new diagnoses, Hypersexual Disorder. Here’s the proposed definition:

Hypersexual Disorder

A.    Over a period of at least six months, recurrent and intense sexual fantasies, sexual urges, and sexual behavior in association with four or more of the following five criteria:

(1)   A great deal of time is consumed by sexual fantasies and urges, and by planning for and engaging in sexual behavior. [15]

(2)   Repetitively engaging in these sexual fantasies, urges, and behavior in response to dysphoric mood states (e.g., anxiety, depression, boredom, irritability). [16]

(3)   Repetitively engaging in sexual fantasies, urges, and behavior in response to stressful life events. [17]

(4)   Repetitive but unsuccessful efforts to control or significantly reduce these sexual fantasies, urges, and behavior. [18]

(5)   Repetitively engaging in sexual behavior while disregarding the risk for physical or emotional harm to self or others. [19]

B.    There is clinically significant personal distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of functioning associated with the frequency and intensity of these sexual fantasies, urges, and behavior. [20]

C.     These sexual fantasies, urges, and behavior are not due to the direct physiological effect of an exogenous substance (e.g., a drug of abuse or a medication). [21]

This is really ghastly. What they have described can easily be categorized as common and reasonable sexual experience. 

How many of us think about having sex "a great deal of the time"?

How many of us have sex in response to stress or anxiety? 

And how many of us would say that after having sex we feel less anxious, more relaxed? 

Are these signs of a disorder?

Let’s consider an example, one of hundreds I could offer from my personal and professional life as a sex educator and, maybe more importantly, someone who is willing to talk to anyone about sexuality.

Doug grew up always feeling a bit different from his friends. He never knew exactly why but by the time he was 10 or 11 he realized that he felt about boys the way most of the boys felt about girls. He also was interested in girls, and they seemed interested in him. So he became a teenager and started being sexual with girls and then women.  He really loves sex, he thinks about it a fair bit, and when he wasn’t attached to one person would have sex, often after only a few dates. He always felt tension, stress, about this other thing he was interested in, but he knew that wanting to have sex with guys was weird and wrong  (he “knew” this not because he felt it instinctually, but because he was told this by everyone in his life and 95% of all media he consumed). Now he’s in his 30s and in a good relationship with a woman and they are talking about marriage. He decides he has to tell his partner about this. What he says is that he’s always had feelings and desires; they have always stressed him out, and made him question aspects of who he is. 

Doug would absolutely qualify for a diagnosis of hypersexual disorder. Is Doug sick? Does he need medical treatment? Is Doug’s situation abnormal? What would happen today if Doug sought counseling or psychiatry? What would happen three years from now if Hypersexual Disorder makes it into the DSM-5?

The second requirement of “personal distress” is often offered as a bone to those of us who cringe at the thought of medicalizing sexuality. The problem is that the way we are sexually socialized and the popular discourse around sexuality leads a path to personal distress. Our sexual options are so narrow that most of us have something, in the eyes of Dr. Phil and the DSM, to be stressed about.

As a sex educator I encounter people all the time who are distressed by their perfectly healthy desires for sex. There is simply no argument I have heard thus far that would lead me to think that a medical diagnosis would serve anyone in this situation any good.

Read more - New York Times: Revising Book on Disorders of the Mind

Over the last three years, women living with disabilities and physical differences took part in arts-based workshops. Workshop activities and discussions explored identity and the meaning we find in our experiences. How do we want to be seen? What is important to us?

The result is the dynamic multimedia Envisioning exhibit featuring 34 photographs and 12 digital stories. By creating their art, women use the power of image to share their life experiences, expertise, and imagination.

Even in contemporary public discourse, discussions of sexuality tend to be guided by moral bias rather than critical judgment. Sex may be more visible in this day and age — it’s used to sell products from lattes to jeans — but sexuality, truly examined, still makes legislators uncomfortable. When the government determines what is and isn’t a morally acceptable exploration of sexuality, we risk losing not only our artistic works, but our sexual freedom.

When it comes to sex we’ve always believed the lines between giving and receiving are fuzzy at best. This Valentine’s Day we’re bringing that theory into reality by offering you something for yourself, just for giving something to someone else. Every order over $50 placed between January 20, 2010 and February 14, 2010 will receive FREE SHIPPING and a coupon for $10 off your next order. Give this month, and get back next month. Everyone wins. more information

Big Tease Toys is infamous for their Rub Your Duckie series of discreet (and fun!) vibrators. Their ducks have been to Paris, into the BDSM scene and have even been shrunk down to the popular and powerful I Rub My Travel Duckie for on-the-go fun. For the holidays, Big Tease brings us the I Rub My Travel Duckie as an ornament: enclosed in a holiday orb ready to hang on a tree, stocking hook or loved one! more info

Soon after opening in 1997 we found that porn was the product customers came in with the most baggage around. Being the first feminist identified sex shop in Toronto that also carried a range of porn -- from soft to extremely hardcore -- we had a lot of people coming to us interested in giving porn another try, but turned off by previous experiences and not sure where to start.

As a result, porn has been the product line that demands the most reflection and work from our collective membership. We probably spend more time watching, thinking, and debating porn than anything else we carry. All that talk came in handy when, a few years back, we decided it was time to devise a classification system for customers.

Which brings me to anal sex. Anal sex proved to be the first stumbling block. In our first draft everyone involved in the process agreed that anal sex would be a distinguishing feature of the raunchier content we carry (closer to five flames than one). But some members challenged this. What was it, they asked, about anal sex that makes it inherently raunchy or hardcore? Should a sexual activity taken out of the context of erotic energy, people's bodies, and all the non-verbal communication that happens during sex, ever be classified as essentially "hard" or "soft"?

It was a good question, and one we got stuck on for some time. In the end we agreed that when it came to an individuals sex life this didn't make sense at all. But when it comes to porn we feel like it does.

Porn is a kind of fetishization of sexual activity. With few exceptions, porn isn't about the subjective experience of the actors (one notable exception would Tony Comstock's films). So it makes sense in this context to identify porn both as it's produced, but also along the lines that customers most often ask for (and anal sex vs. no anal sex is a common request).

In the end we decided to make our rankings reflect both sexual activities and sexual energy in a film. Like everything at a worker co-operative, we consider our porn nosology a work in progress. Have a look and if you've got comments, suggestions, or controversies you'd like to suggest, let us know!

	Light and Breezy. Titles may titillate but keep the action relatively clean. No anal, no genital close ups, no external ejaculation.
	Penultimate Porn. Scenes feature light-hearted sex, actors understanding and responding to their partner's desires. Some external ejaculations, occasional anal sex, threesomes, and girl-on-girl.
	The Mid Point. Scenes feature light-hearted sex, actors understanding and responding to their partner's desires. Some external ejaculations, occasional anal sex, threesomes, and girl-on-girl.
	More Bang for the Buck. Sex that's raunchy and to the point. Expect multiple scenes involving anal sex, group sex, some power play, zoomed-in shots, and facial ejaculations.
	Hard as We Want to Be. The most explicit content we carry. Titles may feature power play and/or rough sex, multiple anal scenes, double penetrations and dirty talk.

This new harness from Aslan Leather is the epitome of sexy, comfortable, and functional. Similar to the ever-popular Jaguar, the Minx features a stunning, corset-style, lace-up back. Available in black ($165), leopard ($180), and as just the back as an addition if you already own a Jaguar ($65).

Click the image to view all new products from Come As You Are!

Developing Competency with Transsexual and Transgender Patients: Primary Care and Hormone Prescription

DATE: Wednesday, March 31st, 2010
TIME: 6:30 pm
LOCATION: Centre St-Pierre, 1212 Panet, Room 201, Metro Beaudry, wheelchair accessible


We, The Trans Health Network of Québec, would like to officially extend to you an invitation to participate in what will be a unique and valuable training opportunity.  

The Trans Health Network is a collective comprised of several community organizations as well as a few individuals dedicated to promoting access to health resources for transgender, transsexual, and gender-variant individuals. In doing this, we have recognized that part of increasing access to healthcare for trans-identified people in the community is to build awareness of trans-specific healthcare needs amongst medical professionals – this includes knowledge of a number of specific issues such as prescribing hormone therapy and being sensitive to people’s chosen names and pronouns. 

We are contacting you because we have either had contact with you in the past, your name was recommended to us, or you have expressed interest in becoming more familiar with trans-specific healthcare. 
 
Thus, we would like to invite you to this special training opportunity. This will be a chance to become more familiar with the basics of respecting trans identities, find out the general state of access to healthcare for trans people in Québec, and learn how to prescribe hormone therapy and how to perform sensitive and respectful examinations. As well, this will be a chance for you to meet other medical professionals interested in providing better healthcare to trans-identified individuals.  

The future health of the trans community depends on being able to receive adequate and respectful healthcare – and for that we need you!

Please RSVP  by Monday, March 29th.
If you have any questions, please contact us at santetranshealth@gmail.com

bCurious – This awesomely shaped external vibe is an affordable option for those looking for a great multi-functional rechargeable vibe. http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/shop/product/bSwish-bCurious-Rechargeable-Vibrator/

Fleshlight Vibro – For years, we’ve had customers asking for a Fleshlight that combines vibration with it’s already excellent design. The new Vibro comes with three multi-speed one-touch vibes that are inserted into the sleeve to take this Fleshlight to a new level. It’s also a deal - $100 for sleeve and case, plus the vibrators – and it comes in it’s own sexy tin.

http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/shop/product/Fleshlight-Vibro-Pink-Lady/

Lelo Mona – Lelo’s got a new design out – they’ve upgraded their traditional control pad with easier to use push buttons, as well as streamlined the design of the body of the vibrator. Check out Mona – a total steal on sale at $110.

http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/shop/product/Lelo-Mona-Vibrator/

Toronto artist Mallory Diaczun, creator of Queen West’s most infamous dirty work "Jenna’s Colouring Book" (which features line drawings of porn star Jenna Jameson), is the headliner of the Girl + Girl show, striking a calculated balance between wit and candor. Mallory Diaczun has collaborated with fellow artist Erin Finley for this exhibition; Finley’s works, which complement Diaczun’s in terms of an approach to technique, offer glimpses into forbidden love. Both artists are interested in posing questions about sexual power and submission; the interchangeability of gender roles; and the garish spectacle of sex in popular culture. These two young women investigate what it means to fantasize about rap stars, tennis heroes, and the girls next door – all through feminist eyes.

Natasha Saltes is a recent MA graduate in Critical Disability Studies.  She is currently recruiting participants for a qualitative study that she is conducting on disability and online dating. There is very little research on this particular topic - this is a unique opportunity to anonymously take part in an original study that will shed light on the experience of disability and online dating.

The purpose of this study is to examine the impact that online dating presents for people who identify themselves as living with a disability. This study aims to uncover how users with disabilities manage their identity online. This study also attempts to understand the experiences that people with disabilities have had in using online dating services and the ways in which online dating experiences may differ from offline experiences. 

Take the online questionnaire

Read the informed consent form

If you have any questions or concerns about this study please send an email to disabilitydatingstudy@gmail.com

Are You Looking For a Treatment Option For This Pain?

We are looking for women living in the Kingston area to participate in a study on the effectiveness of two non-medical treatment options for painful intercourse

Study Procedures:

gynaecological examination, interview, physical testing and assessment, 8 sessions of treatment (cognitive-behavioural therapy or pelvic floor physical therapy) over 12 weeks, and follow-up sessions

**Treatment provided free of charge**  (compensation also provided)

All information is strictly confidential.

For more information, please contact the Sexual Health Research Lab:   (613) 533-3276

or email:  SHRL@queensu.ca

Investigators:

Caroline Pukall PhD, Linda McLean BScPT, PhD, Susan Chamberlain MD

Corrie Goldfinger, MSc, PhD Student, Stephanie Thibault-Gagnon BScPT, MSc Student

I was prepared to love the movie because I'm such a fan of its director, Sook-Yin Lee, and what I had heard about it made me think I would. But I didn't know it would be as amazing, and as contemplative as it was. I'm a bit worried that the depth of the film will be lost by those who take it as a kind of quirky, indie, mumble-core-esque Canadian film. No that there's anything wrong with those things, but YOTC is, I think, a very different kind of movie, mostly because Sook-Yin Lee is a very different kind of director. ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/sex-store-thoughts-on-the-giambrone-sex-scandal/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/sex-store-thoughts-on-the-giambrone-sex-scandal/#comments B3FCE6BC-B6D5-E3C7-21DD32FF44BD19F5 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 00:00:00 -0400 There’s a brilliant skit in the making, comparing Toronto’s homegrown Adam Giambrone “sex scandal” with any number of recent similar incidents in the U.S (John Edwards, Tiger Woods, etc., etc.). Unfortunately the CBC’s content factory will probably be charged with that task and we’ll have to sit through another painful 4 minutes during The Current or Q just waiting for it to be over.   Maybe Stephen Colbert will do something, and then the Star will cover it (at least it would be funny).

Our favourite comment so far comes, not surprisingly, from filmmaker Bruce La Bruce who tweeted “Why not just let politicians be exempt from unrealistic expectations about marriage & monogamy? Vote promiscuity!”   We’d like to extend that to everyone, not just politicians. 

We don’t relish anyone’s sex life becoming public without their permission, and take no pleasure in rifling through sexual communications of people we don’t know. But since The Toronto Star refuses to stop leaving free copies of their paper on our front stoop, we read it, and we can’t help but think that the texts on both sides sound fake. We hear a lot of dirty talk and receive our fair share of dirty texts at Come As You Are, and the line "I still think of you when I need ... um ... stimulation." feels more like language we’d use in an educational setting, maybe a hospital or nursing home, and less like the torrid typing of young, “inappropriate” lovers. If these are the real texts from the parties involved, this will probably be a short lived, and somewhat salacious-less scandal indeed.

What we’d like to know is what exactly does Giambrone think was inappropriate about this relationship in the first place? As, thankfully, most journalists and bloggers have pointed out, we don’t really know anything about what may or may not have happened. The Star just printed allegations. Regardless of the situation, we’re fascinated by the kinds of relationships people label as appropriate and inappropriate.

But as we got talking about it pretty quickly we realized something wasn’t sitting right with us. The letter and the subsequent media coverage framed the issues in an incredibly narrow way (women are the only ones who use sex toys? Sex toy regulation represents an “urgent” health issue?) Equally upsetting for us as activists was what we see a lack of thinking through on the part of retailers calling for regulation. If sex toys were to somehow be regulated for health safety reasons, this could very likely lead to a further medicalization of sexual pleasure, something we’re already fighting on a few fronts.  We remain unconvinced that the government is the place to turn for complicated understandings of sexual health and pleasure, particularly for those of us who experience marginalization based on gender and/or sexuality.

We knew we had to speak up, so we collectively drafted this letter which we’ve sent to the minister. Whether she responds, or this issue goes anywhere, it’s our hope that any further public discussion about the issue will include not just a small group of relatively affluent Canadians, but any of us who want to be heard. We also encourage you to contact the minister directly with words of support, comment, or concern. Dr. Bennett has an admirable track record of raising difficult issues and fighting for women’s sexual and reproductive health. 

We hope you’ll join us in helping her widen her vision and begin a larger and more complicated conversation about sexual pleasure, health, and sex toy safety in Canada.

You can see the letter we sent here, or keep reading the less official looking, no letterhead version below.

****

Hon. Dr. Carolyn Bennett
Community Office
1650 Yonge Street, Suite 103
Toronto, Ontario M4T 2A2

Tuesday January 5, 2010

Dear Hon. Dr. Bennett:

We are writing to thank you for your recent interest in sexual health concerns related to the sex toy industry in Canada. We are pleased to hear of your commitment to raising awareness of sexual well-being and are impressed and excited by your statements encouraging our government not to shy away from discussions on matters such as sex toys because of potential personal discomfort.

We hope that your actions will give way to a larger national discussion on these matters. And it’s in that spirit that we wanted to share some of our concerns about the way these issues are being framed both in your letter and in the media.

Our first concern is the framing of sex toy safety as an issue of concern to only, or primarily to women. A recently published article in the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported that only slightly more women than men (52% vs. 45%) use vibrators [1].   But more importantly we don’t believe that binary gender divisions are useful here. For-profit retailers may choose to market to a specific demographic, but as a co-operatively run sex store that represents Canadians of multiple genders, orientations, and identities, we can tell you that men, women, trans folk, people who don’t feel like they fit in any of those categories, and people who identify as straight, gay, bisexual, and otherwise have been using sex toys for decades, and they are equally affected by sex toy safety. We’d like to propose that as we begin this conversation we invite everyone to participate, not only those with established political or financial clout.  

Our second concern is about ideas of regulation, safety, and access.   We’re sure you agree with us that safety and risk exist on a continuum. The question that your letter poses for us is this: who benefits and who loses if only those products that carry zero risk are permitted to be sold? The toys that are currently being raised as potentially toxic represent those that are more affordable, while the toys that are being held up as safer are financially out of reach for many of us. While we agree that further research should be done to determine the safety of sex toy materials, we are concerned that banning all but those that carry zero risk may be akin to demanding that we all eat organic--while this might be ideal, approaching the issue by simply banning all others produces risks leaving many hungry. At Come As You Are we believe that less expensive products increase accessibility to sexual exploration and health. We believe that informing consumers of the risks and teaching them how to protect themselves (for example, using condoms on toys) is preferable to attempting to ban all but the most expensive of products.

Finally, while we appreciate how difficult it is to prioritize health issues, we do want to propose that in Canada we have other, more urgent, sexual health issues, issues that are already well identified by research, and that arguably impact a larger number of Canadians. We are thinking of the fact that Indigenous women in this country continue to be many times more likely to die of cervical cancer than their Non-Indigenous counterparts[2] ; that abortions continue to be inaccessible to women across the nation, but in particular to women living in the north[3] ; and that HIV in Canada continues to disproportionately affect specific populations, such as men who have sex with men and Aboriginal peoples[4] .

While we care deeply and passionately about sex toys and their implication in sexual health, we believe that the above issues perhaps deserve more attention than the likely impossible task of regulating a largely undefined and under-researched product category such as sex toys.

We’d like to join with you and ensure that these issues and the many other sexual health issues facing Canadians today receive the time, funding, and consideration they are due.

Thank you again for raising this important issue. We look forward to the opportunity to discuss this with you in the future..

Wishing you a happy new year,

Ignacia Black, Annanda DaSilva, Charlotte Henderson, Holly Hirst, Reese Jones, gill lamon, Sarah Forbes-Roberts, Cory Silverberg
Come As You Are Co-operative.

References:

1. Herbenick, D., Reece, M., Sanders, S.A., et. al. "Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Women in the United States: Results from a Nationally Representative Study" Journal of Sexual Medicine. Vol. 6, No. 7 (2009):1857 – 1866.

2. National Aboriginal Health Organization. Cancer of the Cervix in North American Indian Women: A literature review. First Nations Centre, October 2006. Accessed 12/28/09. 

3. Shaw, Jessica. Reality Check: A Close Look at Accessing Abortion Services in Canadian Hospitals. Canadians for Choice Report Launch National Press Club. April 2nd 2007. Accessed 12/27/09.

4. Smith, Michael R. HIV in Canada: Trends and Issues for Advancing Prevention, Care, Treatment and Support through Knowledge Exchange. Centre for Infectious Disease Prevention & Control, PHAC. Accessed 1/1/10.

If you need attendant services you probably need your attendant to assist with some aspects of sexual expression (whether that’s dressing up the way you want, going out to a strip club or bar, a sex party or sex store, etc….)

But attendants receive no training and little guidance on what is and isn’t part of their job, and if you use attendant services you’ve probably never had any training or guidance on how to talk with an attendant about sex.

This project is an initial effort at addressing these lacks and developing training and resources for both attendants and people who use attendant services.

If you use attendant services, they want to hear from you. You can fill out a survey here (you’ll have to cut and paste the URL, sometimes the link doesn’t work):

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/6TPRSRR

If you need assistance in filling out a survey, or would be able to participate in a phone survey, please contact the project coordinator, Fran Odette, at the information below.

There is also a survey for attendants.  If you know of attendants who you think would be interested in completing the survey, they will have to cut and paste that survey address below and paste into their server. It should take them directly to the attendant survey:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/V7TSFYD

To learn more about the project or to receive a version of the online survey in alternate format, contact 

Fran Odette, Project Coordinator at 416-968-3422 Ext. 30 or at f.odette@gmail.com

This project is done in partnership with the Centre for Independent Living in Toronto, Niagara Centre for Independent Living, and Independent Centre and Network

Reminiscent of some spam emails that I’m sure everyone gets with oddly placed and sometimes non-existent english words, we are treated to some awesome descriptions of the ladies that are “advertised” on www.favoritegirl.net. It may also just be a botched translation.

Some of my faves:

-“Her place is so newborn and has a clump of firm noesis already.”

-the use of the word “crapper”

-“Wow… does this teenaged countenance artful or what! Britney has these artful braces on which declare shes… meet overturned 18!”

-“Check discover the galleries beneath but if you poverty more go here.”

-“Dream buffoon is so hot…”

-“Hmmm Karenic is lethargic alright.”

Enjoy.

Next Wednesday, come check out the Sparkle Cocktail Party as part of the weekly event Granny Boots held at the Gladstone, 1214 Queen St W right here in Toronto. Featuring performances by some of our staff here at Come As You Are, and more. Wheelchair accessible dance party!

Toronto artist Mallory Diaczun, creator of Queen West’s most infamous dirty work "Jenna’s Colouring Book" (which features line drawings of porn star Jenna Jameson), is the headliner of the Girl + Girl show, striking a calculated balance between wit and candor. Mallory Diaczun has collaborated with fellow artist Erin Finley for this exhibition; Finley’s works, which complement Diaczun’s in terms of an approach to technique, offer glimpses into forbidden love. Both artists are interested in posing questions about sexual power and submission; the interchangeability of gender roles; and the garish spectacle of sex in popular culture. These two young women investigate what it means to fantasize about rap stars, tennis heroes, and the girls next door – all through feminist eyes.

Find out more about Toronto Nuit Blanche

The purpose of this survey is to gather information regarding the challenges faced by lesbian, bisexual and queer women, and transgendered and transsexual people who live with invisible chronic illnesses.

You do not have to have a formal medical diagnosis to fill out this survey. However, you must have an invisible chronic physical condition. Invisible chronic illnesses (ICIs) share a number of characteristics regardless of diagnosis. Some of these characteristics are: non-observable symptoms (i.e. pain, fatigue, cognitive difficulty), some symptoms are immeasurable, sometimes people appear well, and the illness has periods of exacerbation and remission. There are many ICIs. A few examples are: multiple sclerosis, arthritis, HIV, fibromyalgia, lupus, and irritable bowel syndrome.

If you are not sure whether you are living with an ICI we still want to hear from you. Please fill out the survey. There will be room at the end for comments and you can let us know there why you are not sure.

You also must reside in Canada since the results of the survey will be used to advocate for change within the Canadian medical system and for community-based services. It does not matter whether you are a Canadian citizen, permanent resident, refugee claimant, temporary worker, or undocumented.  As well, you must be at least 18 years old.

This survey is anonymous. You are not requested to provide your name to participate.  Any identifying information you provide will be altered to ensure confidentiality.  Your privacy will be protected.

The results of this survey will be presented at the Rainbow Health Ontario 2010 Conference to raise awareness regarding ICIs and to start a conversation that will lead to change regarding the services needed for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women and trans people living with ICIs. To find out more about Rainbow Health Ontario go to: http://www.rainbowhealthontario.ca/

Additionally, results from this survey may be used for publication to raise awareness and/or advocate for change.

The survey takes between 20 and 30 minutes to fill out. Here is the link:

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/icisurvey

The survey will be online until February 21, 2010.

About the researcher

The researcher is Silvana Bazet. This survey was designed by Silvana with the input of a Community Advisory Committee.  Silvana is a lesbian and lives with an undiagnosed ICI. She is also a psychotherapist in private practice and Clinical Member of the Ontario Society of Psychotherapists.  To find out more about Silvana go to: http://torontopsychotherapy.wordpress.com

Should you have any questions or comments, please contact Silvana at: queericisurvey@gmail.com

The survey is also available in Word to be printed and distributed to those who may not have access to a computer. Please contact Silvana to obtain a copy.

In response, ArtCorps is initiating a new partnership with Oxfam America and the Gender-based Violence Prevention Campaign in El Salvador. ArtCorps is sending Colombian-born, Toronto-based artist Monica Gutierrez to fill a volunteer position in order to empower communities in building stronger, more peaceful societies by using participatory arts as a strategy for education and engagement. Monica will also strive to perpetuate the use of participatory art as an innovative tool for empowering and educating communities among non-governmental organizations.

OXFAM/ArtCorps Fundraiser
WHEN: Sunday, December. 20th, 2009
WHERE:  Teranga African Bar & Restaurant (159 Augusta Ave), 5:00PM
PWYC, suggested $10.00 donation payable at door.

Performing:
- "The Resolutionaries" Zimbabwe Marimba band led by Chaka Chikodzi with Africville Productions (http://www.africville.net/)
- Jadea Kelly (http://jadea.ca/)
- Capoeira dance performance (Open roda)
- DJ Soulquest

In the spirit of giving, we're making self-pleasuring less painful with our boxing week sale. In store, check out our wheel-o-deals for your chance to win prizes and discounts! Online, save 5% when you spend $50, 10% on $100, and a whopping 20% on $200!

It’s the Everything to do with Sex Show’s 10^th anniversary, and once again, Come As You Are will be there representin’. Held at the Direct Energy Centre on the CNE grounds (closest to the Princes’ Gates), this trade show/exhibition/consumer bonanza brings in around 50,000 visitors over the course of it’s three-day weekend--this year, beginning on Friday.

It’s no Vegas AEE by a long shot, but it does still have that rush of excitement in the air. Tons of vendors, live lingerie shows, seminars and over-priced food abound. Unfortunately they don’t get many big porn names to migrate north for the weekend, although they did manage to wrangle Ashlynn Brooke, who is fantastic in a couple of films we carry (Scrubs XXX and The Office XXX).

Come on down this weekend and say hey to us, check out our sweet booth, and if you’re lucky, grab some of our top-secret new CAYA swag – to be unveiled this Friday. We’re gonna be located at booth numbers 323&422, at the start of a row near the workshop space at the northwest corner of the building.

See you there!

Why Millions of Women Are Using Porn and Erotica

It’s interesting to think of the ‘morning after’ as something that is shameful. Personally, I feel like it’s kind of an awesome thing – there are many good things tied to it (I’m thinking caesars and bruch). Even though we all have our fair share of what might feel like regrets, the walk of shame should, in fact, be more of a walk of accomplishment. I’m a big fan of notches in bedposts.

It’s exciting to be able to get new silicone toys around here, and we’ve got a bunch of new stuff for you to check out.

First, there’s Fun Factory’s Share XS, another version of their double dildo. This one has the same size end for the wearer, but the other end is much smaller. Great for beginners to receiving anal penetration, or those who prefer something a bit smaller. Can be worn with or without a harness. 

Next up is one of the brand spankin’ new Lelo toys, Billy. Very similar to the Liv, Billy has a bit of a flared base to make it safe for both vaginal and anal penetration. Fancy pulsing settings as well as a great rechargeable, long-lasting motor.

2 more dildos from our fave Canadian silicone toy makers, Happy Valley brings us Joy and Jet. Both come in nice firm silicone in shiny colours, they also feature a little space for a wireless bullet in the base if you want a vibrating toy. Great for use with harnesses, or however you want to play! 

First up, is the long awaited re-release of Zazel. This was one of our best selling titles when we first opened, and they’ve just made it available in a brand new 2-disc edition, remastered in HD widescreen.

The look of our new Tear Leather Fetish Collar can only be described as classic. Turn any neck into an El Greco masterpiece!

And what’s more classic than a good ol' queer daddy fantasy? Daddies offers stories of younger guys lusting after older, more experienced men...and vice-versa.

Online, we organize and categorize our products much as we do in our Toronto store, but until we complete our top-secret customer service hologram program, our collective knowledge comes in the form of articles and blog posts and our in-store guidance skills have been compiled into this handy guide to our sex toy, DVD and book ratings.

This newsletter marks the beginning of our co-operative’s 13th year in existence. In some ways it seems like only yesterday that we first opened our doors (and six months later launched our first website). But it also feels like a long, long time ago. Much has changed and much has remained the same. When you’re a member of a co-operative every part of doing business is a little different than when you work at a regular undemocratic business.

An Ottawa man was charged and convicted of sexual assault for penetrating his partner with a dildo while she was unconscious. Apparently, the couple was hot-and-heavy into asphyxiation and according to The Globe and Mail, their relationship soured and a few weeks later, the 'top' partner was charged. As it stands now, the conviction has been overturned by the Ontario Court of Appeals and almost inevitably, that decision will be appealed, and this will probably wind up in front of the Supreme Court of Canada.

This case is seriously problematic, and I'm probably being far too optimistic in hoping that this decision leads to some legal clarity for folks who participate in BDSM. I'll leave the asphyxiation warnings (auto-erotic and otherwise) to Dan Savage (he feels more strongly about this than I do), but in a country where the government does not meddle in our bedrooms, people who play with power and sex don't have any protection against accusations of sexual assault. Similarly, folks engaging in BDSM play who are violated or assaulted, will have a difficult (if not impossible) time explaining to authorities how consent works in their relationships.

I know the Canadian media and courts are framing this as an issue of whether a person can consent to acts performed while they are unconscious, but I'm not sure that consciousness is even relevant here. The Globe article used some nice touchy-feely analogies - eg. snuggling your lover while they're asleep - but I think that establishing consent while someone is bound-and-gagged is equally problematic and is almost equivalent here. Of course, millions of Canadians work out these issues every day on their own without the help of the government, but the question remains - what happens when things do go wrong and the cops are called?

I guess we'll find out soon enough...

Show runs from May 1st to 31st.
Art Opening:  Saturday, May 1, 2010. 7pm - 10pm.

While the debate over sex education in schools will surely continue through all of our lifetimes, it is undeniable that most of us never received a proper education in sexuality or sexual health, and we spend much of our adult lives sorting out the mass of misinformation we received in our youth. Fortunately, as adults, it is much easier to access information about sex - we can seek out information online; we can attend sex education workshops at our favourite sex-positive sex shop; we are able to purchase or rent or download sex instruction DVDs.

However, with all of the information out there about sex and sexuality (especially online), it is becoming increasingly difficult to sort out fact from fiction, and this is where we can help! We have spent the majority of our adulthood sorting through sexual health information and sexuality products to bring you only the best of the best from sources that we’ve found to be reliable.

Our sex education workshops are performed by internationally recognized sex educators and authors; all of the books on our shelves have been read by us to ensure accuracy; our adult and educational DVDs are thoroughly reviewed; and our selection of sex toys have actually been tried by us so you know that they actually do what they claim.

We don’t fancy ourselves experts - you’re the only expert on your sexuality - we’re just here to help guide on your journey toward greater sexual health and pleasure.

Planned Parenthood Toronto is looking for volunteer peer educators to talk with youth and women about sexual health! Whether it's about pregnancy options, birth control, STIs, or healthy relationships, our volunteers are trained to answer questions and share information in a non-judgmental, pro-choice, youth-positive, and inclusive manner.

WANNA TALK ABOUT SEX?

-Teen Programming needs volunteers aged 16-19 to answer questions via e-mail, through our Teen SexInfoLine, and using MSN chat sessions.

-Health Services needs volunteers aged 18-29 to facilitate face-to-face peer education sessions with youth clients at PPT's community health centre.

-Women's Programming needs female-identified volunteers aged 19 and up to facilitate face-to-face peer education sessions with female clients at the Bay Centre for Birth Control. Women of color are especially encouraged to apply.  

Please check out PPT.on.ca to get an application. Send your completed Teen Programming and Health Services applications to mthomas@ppt.on.ca. Send your completed Women's Programming todpearson@ppt.on.ca. Applications are accepted through July 31st and training will begin in September.

If you're someone who finds internet (and facebook!) surveys to be completely irresistible, you may get some enjoyment from this. The folks at uClassify (known for their web text classifier) have developed a text analyzer that proports to determine the gender of a particular website based on the text on the site. Much to our pleasure, comeasyouare.com was considered to be 'quite gender neutral' and was 53% 'female'.

To be fair, because we're a worker-owned co-operative and all of the worker-owners (and staff!) contribute co-operatively to our website and shop, it makes a ton of sense that our site reflects a variety of perspectives (gender and otherwise). Also, we've always consciously sought to include people of all genders and sexualities in our shop (and website) so I'm especially pleased that some arbitrary web-based gender analyzer has recognized this. As have many of you!

Doin' It Daily Deal: 20% off all Vibrators!
It is hard to believe, but the month of March is almost over and today is the final day for our Doin' it Daily deal of the day. Remember, each deal is only valid for one day, and today, receive 20% off all vibrators! Battery-powered or rechargeable, silicone or elastomer, we've got them all and they're all on sale | view our selection of vibrators!

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: Anal Sex Toys!
Anal sex toys offer a wide range of sensations and possibilities for exploring anal play by yourself or with a partner. There are three main kinds of anal sex toys - plugs, beads and prostate massagers - and they're all on sale for one day only! | view our selection of anal toys Doin' it Daily Deal: 25% off all anal sex toys!

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: Aslan Leather Jaguar Harness
Aslan's Jaguar was an instant classic when it was revealed a few years ago. This is the Jaguar that started it all. Made from soft and supple garment leather, the Jaguar's D-rings allow for easy leg strap adjustment and comfortable wearing. Best of all, this harness is sexy-as-hell. Medium fits approximately 29"-45", large fits approximately 32" - 52". | more info about Aslan Leather Jaguar Harness

Regular price: $95
Doin' it Daily Deal: $80

Doin' it Daily price: $8
Learn more about Bondage Tape.

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal:
Elastomer Cock Ring
This super-stretchy cock ring is easy to get on and off, but is elastic enough that it fits nice and tight. Made of elastomer rubber so you don't have to worry about latex exposure or those pesky phthalates! | more info about Elastomer Cock Ring

Regular price: $18
Doin' it Daily Deal: $14

Get ready to master the fine art and science of brinksmanship with the Fleshlight Stamina Training Unit! Similar to the classic Fleshlight SpeedBump insert, the Fleshlight STU has exaggerated textured bumps all through the length of the sleeve. The idea behind the STU (and many masturbation programmes designed to help guys 'last longer') is that you masturbate to almost the point of orgasm, and then stop, and repeat. The extreme bumps of the STU just make the challenge a little more challenging! Comes with gold coloured case. Regular price: $85

Doin' it Daily Price: $65

Order Fleshlight STU at this price today only! ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-fun-factory-delight/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-fun-factory-delight/#comments 83159EDE-C9F1-F5DF-B1324A41AD5DE694 Mon, 22 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0400

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: Fun Factory Delight
It's delicious, it's de-lovely, it's delightful... Fun Factory brings vibe design to a ultimate new height with Delight. Made of non-porous and phthalate-free silicone and hard plastic, this rechargeable, simultaneous external/internal vibrator charges in its own sexy, discreet case. The convenient handle accommodates both solo and partner play, and also helps to make the g spot and clitoral zones accessible at once. Featuring a wide variety of intensities and pulsations, Delight has to be seen--and tried--for yourself. | more info about Fun Factory Delight

Regular price: $172
Doin' it Daily Deal: $150

Doin' it Daily price: $20
Learn more about Hathor Aphrodisia Lubriciant.

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: Hitachi Magic Wand
One of the few "brand names" in sex toys, the Hitachi Magic Wand is our bestselling vibrator. With a soft, tennis-ball-sized head and pulsating vibrations, this toy is a favourite for both solo and partner play. Two speeds: strong, and stronger.| more info about Hitachi Magic Wand

Regular price: $70
Doin' it Daily Deal: $60

Regular price: $80
Doin' it Daily Deal: $60

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal:
LifeStyle Skyn Condoms
At long last, a non-latex condom that's affordable and provides protection equal to latex. Let us introduce you to LifeStyles SKYN, condoms made of stretchy polyisoprene to provide a more comfortable and custom fit than traditional polyurethane non-latex condoms at half the cost. | more info about LifeStyle Skyn Condoms

Regular price: $15
Doin' it Daily Deal: $12

Doin' it Daily price: $200
Learn more about Love Bumper Love Lounge.

One of our favorite sex educators and bondage teachers, Midori, brings us her newest fiction offering--and it was worth the wait! Master Han’s Daughter vividly describes the world of NeoToyko where cyberpunks, pharmaceutical companies, sex workers and Japanese traditions collide to create explicit erotic stories where sex is everything but simple. At times dark and tormented but always with a dash of humour, these characters offer up an erotic pallet both beautiful and violent. A distopic future brimming with sexuality and new erotic possibilities! Regular price: $13.99

Doin' it Daily Price: $10.50

Order Master Han's Daughter at this price today only!

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: Nexus G-Play Medium
We love Nexus for their innovative silicone prostate toys, but we love them even more now that they're spreading the love to folks of all genders. The Nexus G-Play is a multi-function and multi-speed silicone vibe that works as well working the prostate as it does for g-spot play. The sleek, slender shape and variable speeds make it ideal for prostate and penetration play for newbies and anyone who likes a small but mighty vibe. Comes in three sizes. | more info about Nexus G-Play Medium

Regular price: $43
Doin' it Daily Deal: $30

Doin' it Daily price: $90
More about Nexus G-Play

Doin' it Daily price: $120
Find out more about NobEssence.

You’ll have more than just a mere Tryst with these stylish sustainable wood dildos from NobEssence. Totally waterproof, non-toxic and easy to clean, their almost-patented inert polymer wood finish will keep your Tryst non-porous and will defy everything you thought you knew about wood. Each piece is handcrafted out of a unique piece of sustainable exotic hardwood. Regular price: $170

Doin' it Daily Price: $100

Order NobEssence Tryst at this price today only! ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-ohmibod-freestyle-on-sale/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-ohmibod-freestyle-on-sale/#comments 29D9DF6F-DA1F-47FB-97C12A1473291FC6 Sat, 06 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0400 OhMiBod have always been the true innovators of the music-driven vibrator, and in keeping with that reputation, OhMiBod has released the world's first truly wireless iPod vibrator: FreeStyle. With OhMiBod's 2.4Ghz transmitter hooked up to your music making device, your FreeStyle will vibrate along with your jams 25 feet away from your iPod or iPhone! The FreeStyle is splashproof, rechargeable and has seven modes of vibration for those times when you want the vibe without the music. Works with any mp3 player, discman, walkman or other music device with a headphone jack. Regular price: $150

Doin' it Daily price: $100
Learn more about OhMiBod FreeStyle .

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, anal toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal:
Pack Man
Is that a new packer in your pants, or are you just happy to see us? Maybe it's both, since there's definitely a new packer in town. We were feeling a need for a more affordable but still durable packer, and one that would give us a colour selection, so we turned to our local dildo manufacturer, Happy Valley and asked them to turn our dreams into reality. | more info about Pack Man

Regular price: $40
Doin' it Daily Deal: $30

Got a thing for redheads? This DVD will be just the thing to spice up your evening! A collection of scenes featuring sexy cinnamon babes and their hot partners. All natural bodies. Best scene: the 2 girl light power play scene featuring a red haired pin up domme and her sexy sub, including smoking, soft spanking, flogging and toys. Regular price: $29

Doin' it Daily Price: $15

Order Red Hotz DVD at this price today only! ]]> http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-silicone-sex-toys-on-sale/ http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/blog/doin-it-daily-silicone-sex-toys-on-sale/#comments ACAC5752-BC2A-49B8-6D97DB5D3E642937 Mon, 29 Mar 2010 00:00:00 -0400

Doin' It Daily!
It's hard to believe, but the month of spring is upon us. To celebrate we're offering daily specials for the rest of March. Each day we'll post a new product on our home page at a dangerously sexy new price, good for one day only. We've got a little bit of everything, vibes, lube, dildos, porn, silicone sex toys, erotica, and more. You can also click here to sign up and receive a fresh special every day. So sign up and save, and before you know it, spring will have sprung!

Doin' It Daily Deal: All Silicone Sex Toys!
Silicone is an ideal material for sex toys - it is hypoallergenic, non-porous and easy to clean - and for today only, it is also on sale! All of our silicone vibrators, dildos and silicone sex toys are 20% off! | view our selection of silicone vibrators, silicone dildos and silicone anal toys!

Regular price: $11 - $16
Doin' it Daily Deal: $8 - $12

Doin' it Daily price: $18
Get your hands on a box of Latex Gloves today!

Check out our selection of queer and trans erotica, educational books and DVDs on sale!