What are Dildos?
Dildos are sex toys designed for penetration, and they come in a wide range of shapes, sizes, and colours! Dildos don't 'do' anything other than what we make them do (they don't have motors or moving parts). The pleasure of dildos comes mainly from penetration. Dildos are made from a wide range of materials, including silicone, jelly rubber, stainless steel, and glass.
How To Choose A Dildo
Choosing the right dildo comes down to a few key considerations: shape / style, size, colour, material, and harness compatibility. If you’re shopping with a partner, you’ll probably find that there are some similarities in what you’re looking for, but there may also be some significant differences. Some folks are able to come to a compromise, while others opt to buy separate dildos - one to suit each of their tastes. Either way, we’ve got some hot tips to help streamline the process.
Shape and Style
Dildos vary in shape and style. Some sport a nice curve, while others are almost perfectly straight. Some dildos are realistic looking, some come in playful shapes (like rocket ships), and others come in more of a wand style. Some have balls attached, and some don’t. It’s a good idea to take into consideration how you plan on using your dildo in order to pick a shape that works well for you. If you’re really into g-spot stimulation, you’ll probably want to go with a dildo that’s nicely curved, to help you reach your hot spot. If you’re interested in deep penetration, you may want to opt for a dildo with a straighter shape in order to help out with this. We also carry a style of dildo called a double dildo. As the name suggests, a double dildo - also called a double-header or double-ended dildo - is a sex toy designed with two ends that are each safe for penetration. Double dildos can be used by any two people for simultaneous penetration, or by one person for double penetration. Lots of dildos can be used for butt play. If you’re planning on using a dildo for anal penetration, it must be anal compatible and have a flared base and be free of sharp edges or seams. For more information on anal dildos, check out our article, Learning About Anal Toys. One last style consideration is whether or not the dildo has a suction cup base. For some folks this is a non-issue, but for people who enjoy riding their dildo hands-free, having a suction cup that holds the toy securely to a flat surface can help out a lot!
Size
Size is another consideration for a lot of people when buying their first (or fifth, or twentieth!) dildo. When choosing a dildo for the first time, a lot of people are unsure about size. Many people find it helpful to consider the width (or girth) of their toy, and what appeals to them. Width is an important factor, because there’s no way of changing it. If you’re unsure, it’s a good idea to choose something a bit on the smaller side, so that it’s comfortable to use and you have the chance to adjust to your new toy. With length, there’s a bit more wiggle room (so to speak), since you can insert as much or as little of the length of the toy as you want, at any given time.
Colour
In addition to shape and size, colour is a great thing to consider when picking out your ideal dildo! Dildo colours have come a long way, and you can now choose between different flesh tones, a wide range of bright colours, and lots of fun patterns (tie dye dildo, anyone?).
Material
Dildos are available in a variety of materials, each with their pros and cons.
- Silicone dildos are our first choice for quality, variation, and ease of cleaning. As with most higher quality materials, silicone tends to be on the more expensive end of the price scale.
- VixSkin is made exclusively by Vixen Creations, and is a high quality silicone that looks and feels like CyberSkin. These dildos are also dual-density, with a softer material on the outside and a firm inner core. They’re as durable, easy to clean, and safe to use as any other 100% silicone product.
- Jelly Rubber dildos are inexpensive and can be great beginner toys, but are also porous. They’re a good option, as long as you put a fresh condom on your toy for each use.
- There are several variations of CyberSkin dildos, and they all offer an incredibly soft feel, without the high cost of silicone VixSkin toys. CyberSkin is porous and, as with jelly rubber toys, we recommend using condoms with your CyberSkin dildos.
- Stainless steel dildos and glass dildos can be great, and we like to think of them as 'special occasion' sex toys. They have a durability, weight, and feel that is unparalleled, but their intensity may not be for everyday use. They also tend to come at a higher price point.
Some people are concerned about the safety of sex toy materials, and if you count yourself among them, we recommend reading our Learn About Sex Toy Materials article before choosing a toy.
Strap-On Harness Compatible Dildos
If you think you may ever want to use your dildo in a strap-on harness, it's best to choose a dildo that is harness compatible. This means making sure your dildo has a flared base wide enough that it won't slip through the opening or o-ring of a standard harness, and making sure you choose something that’s firm enough that it won't flop around too much during use. Our recommendation is to opt for a silicone dildo, as most of these are made with strap-on harness use in mind. In addition, it’s a good idea to consider how the dildo will sit against the harness wearer’s body, since some dildos can provide stimulation to both the wearer and the person being penetrated. For example, some harness compatible dildos are designed with texturing at the base, in order to stimulate the wearer’s bits while they penetrate their partner. Some harness compatible dildos are also curved at the base, in order to conform more closely to the wearer’s body while in use.
How To Choose A Double Dildo
While your goal may be to find the perfect double dildo, perfection might not be totally realistic (or desirable!) in this case. Double dildos are inanimate toys designed to fit in between two animate bodies, and for this reason, they require more than just brilliant design and the right material. They require humour, patience, and communication on the part of the people using them. That said, there are a few things to consider when choosing a double dildo that can help increase your chances of finding one that works for you.
First Timers
In most cases, we recommend that people start with something inexpensive when buying their first new sex toy. Then you can decide if you want to invest in a higher end toy. The drawback is that you need to use condoms with rubber dildos, and they leave something to be desired, as far as design goes.
Size And Shape
Choosing your ideal shape and size is probably the most important part of choosing a double dildo that works for you. In terms of shape, the main distinction is between straight dildos and dildos that have a curved or crescent shape. Many people prefer the curved double dildos, since they can facilitate more physical contact between partners, and provide more options for sex positions. A lot of double dildos have differently shaped ends (like the Vixen Peacemaker and Fun Factory Share), which can be great if you and your partner have different preferences. It’s also worth noting that all dildo dimensions are listed on our site, so if you know what size you like, it’ll be easy to find what you’re looking for by doing a quick scan of our offerings.
Material, Quality, And Cost
Double dildos come in a range of materials, from jelly rubber, to 100% silicone, to stainless steel and glass. A helpful consideration when choosing the material of your sex toy is your budget. Higher quality materials such as silicone generally last longer, are safer to use, and are much easier to keep clean. Silicone is phthalate-free, latex-free, and can be a good option for people with chemical sensitivities. It’s non-porous, meaning that it presents a lower risk of adverse reactions, since it doesn’t trap bacteria. The downside to higher quality, non-porous materials like silicone is that they can add up to more than twice the price of cheaper materials. We recognize the value of sex toy accessibility, and encourage you to choose a toy that suits as many of your needs as possible (including your budget!). If you do opt for a toy made of porous material like jelly rubber, we recommend that you always use condoms with your toy.
Harness or No Harness
Another consideration is whether or not you want to be able to use your double dildo in a harness. While most double dildos are designed for use without one, the benefit of getting a double dildo that’s harness compatible is the added control that many people experience when using their toy in a harness. Many of the asymmetrical double dildos are designed to be used with or without a harness (like the Fuze Tango). These dildos tend to be on the more expensive side, but they also tend to be better quality, last longer - and by nature of their harness compatibility, they’re also more versatile.
How To Use A Dildo
Dildos are wonderfully empowering sex toys precisely because they do whatever you want them to. When you're playing with a dildo, it's all you. A dildo can offer some added excitement to both the physical and psychological experience of getting yourself - or someone else - off. There's no one right way to use a dildo, but if you're experiencing some shyness with your new toy, here are a few pointers to get you started.
Cleanliness Before
When you get your dildo home, be sure to wash it well before first use. We recommend a mild soap that you'd be comfortable using on your body. Look it over carefully and check for tears. Make sure you've read and understood the care instructions for the material your dildo is made of.
Start Solo
Even if you're planning on using a dildo with a partner, we recommend starting out on your own. This gives you a chance to explore and experiment with your new dildo without any distractions (pleasant though they may be). Using a dildo on your own is also important because it can help you to communicate with a partner in the future about how you want them to use it with you.
Don't Forget The Lube
We recommend using a good quality lubricant with all toys designed for penetration. Dildos don't lubricate themselves, and using lube helps make everything you do with your dildo more slippery and sensitive. Squeeze some lubricant into your hand and rub it along the shaft and tip of the dildo. Using a finger or two, you may want to put some lube in and around the part of your body that the dildo will be coming into contact with. It’s worth noting that some dildos aren’t compatible with certain lubes. For instance, silicone dildos aren’t compatible with silicone lubes and jelly rubber dildos aren’t compatible with oil-based lubes. When in doubt, go with a water-based lube, since it’s compatible with all sex toy materials.
Put a Condom on it!
Unless your dildo is non-porous, you should always use a condom with it. Using condoms is also a great way to make clean-up easier, and to extend the life of your toy.
Anal Penetration
We like to remind our customers that not all dildos are safe for anal use. If you want to use your dildo for anal sex, it has to have a widely flared base (to stop it from slipping up into the rectum) and it should be completely smooth and seamless. Never move a dildo from the anus to other orifices. If you want to use your dildo for anal play as well as other types of penetration, it’s important to use a fresh condom anytime you switch from anal penetration to playing with another body part.
Getting Warmed Up
The first time you use your dildo, you’ll probably want to let yourself get turned on before diving in with penetration. Some people like to masturbate for awhile first. Once you're feeling aroused, you might want to start by using the dildo externally. You can rub it against your body, press it against your skin, and roll it over your sensitive parts. You might also want to experiment with penetration, starting slowly and seeing what it feels like to have just the tip of the dildo inside you. Even if you know you like deep penetration, it can be fun to explore the variation in what you can do with your dildo.
The Motion Of The Ocean And The Depths Of The Sea
Once you've got the basics down, you can start to play with penetration at different depths. Some people like deep penetration, with long, slow strokes, while others like shallow, fast thrusting. You may want to start with one and finish with another. You may also want to experiment with different motions: there's in-and-out, up-and-down, side-to-side, and twisting. You can use a dildo to mimic the way you like to have sex with a partner, or you can use it to do something completely different, that no partner could do.
Let Your Fantasies Run Wild
Using a dildo can be a boon to sexual fantasy. Some people say it’s like having someone else in the room who is exactly the size and shape they want, and who moves precisely the way they want them to, every time. If you don't engage in a lot of sexual fantasy, but you’d like to try it out, you can close your eyes, breathe deeply, play with your dildo, and let your mind wander. Some people enjoy replaying their favourite previous sexual experiences in their mind, and some like imagining new possibilities that turn them on.
Put Some Muscle Into It
A dildo is a great tool to use for pelvic floor muscle (PFM) exercises. With the dildo inserted, you can exercise your PFMs by squeezing them around the girth of the toy. Not only is this a great exercise to help get those muscles in tip top shape, but some people also find it really pleasurable. You can experiment with engaging your PFMs as you push the dildo in, and also as you pull it out. Do make sure you're using lots of lube, and notice how the increased resistance of having a dildo inside, or moving it in or out, changes the way it feels to engage your PFMs.
Don't Forget the Outer Bits
Dildos are designed for internal play, but that doesn’t mean you can’t show your outer bits some love at the same time. Adding external stimulation while using a dildo for penetration can take the experience to a whole new level. It can take some coordination, but you can try matching the speed and pressure of other types of stimulation with the speed and depth of penetration. If this seems like a lot to focus on at once, you can always use a small vibe for other sensitive parts. There are also vibrating cock rings that can be worn at the base of a dildo, that help give some extra attention to the surrounding areas!
Partner Meet Dildo
There are many ways to use a dildo with a partner. They can use it to penetrate you, you can use it to penetrate them, or one of you can use it on yourself while the other person watches or does other things. What's most important is that everyone involved commits to talking it through the first couple of times. Ask what works and what doesn't. Is there any trepidation? It can be good to use it on yourself while your partner watches at least once, so that they can see what turns you on, and how you use the toy.
Double Penetration
Some people like to use dildos for double penetration. Double penetration is an activity that requires lots of patience, lubricant, and protection in order to do it safely. It's important to remember not to transfer any fluid or material from the anus to other parts of the body. If you're interested in exploring double penetration, we recommend reading about it first, and starting out with small dildos (or butt plugs). Since we opened in 1997, we've noticed an increasing trend of straight-identified couples who are interested in exploring anal play. There are now several educational videos and books devoted to women penetrating their male partners (a.k.a. pegging), and the Expert Guide to Anal Pleasure for Men offers lots of hot tips on using a dildo and harness for this type of play. In addition, most of the information outlined in this article (and in our article Learn About Anal Toys) can be applied to couples where a man is being penetrated. The only extra consideration is that many guys still hold negative views of anal play. For some people, the taboo is part of what gets them off. And for those who want to challenge this taboo, the potential for further sexual exploration and pleasure awaits!
How To Use A Double Dildo
We love double dildos, but we like to remind our customers that they are deeply imperfect toys. In the end, a double dildo is an inanimate object that fits between two moving bodies. The result can be hot, but it can also be goofy and, occasionally, even painful. That’s why navigating the land of double dildos with care, communication, and humour is of the essence. Here are some basic tips to help you along your journey.
Take It For A Solo Flight
It's usually best to try out a new toy on your own before using it with a partner. This gives you the chance to check out the features, see what you like, work out any kinks, and pay close attention to what does and doesn't work for you. Oftentimes, double dildos have ends of different sizes and shapes. If you feel inclined, try out each end and see what you like. Flying solo is a great way to get a feel for your new toy. Do keep in mind that if your toy is porous and you're planning on sharing, you should always use a condom for each end of the double dildo you’re playing with.
Care, Communication, and Humour
Once you're ready to use your double dildo with a partner, a few great things to keep in mind are care, communication, and humour. Sometimes things don’t work exactly the way we want them to, or the way they look in porn. Double dildos are great for partners who like to laugh and who are comfortable communicating with each other. Start by using your dildo however feels right for both of you. Even when double dildos don't provide mind-blowing orgasms, they can offer hours of fun, which can be really hot too.
Experiment With Movement
Most people use dildos for penetration, and often favour an in-and-out thrusting motion. Using double dildos often involves a little less in-and-out thrusting (although this is where a harness compatible double dildo can come in handy), so experimenting with moving the dildo in different directions can be helpful. See how it feels to squeeze your muscles around the dildo. Switch it up between long deep strokes and short quick ones, and see what turns you and your partner on.
Finding Middle Ground
One way to help gain a bit more control is to hold onto the middle part of the dildo between you and your partner. Don't forget that whatever you do on one end is going to be felt on the other, so it’s best not to make any sudden movements. Some folks like to take turns holding onto the middle of the toy, while others prefer to hold onto it together. Either way, it can be a great way to help you get some traction and find your groove.
Finding Your Rhythm(s)
In order for double dildos to provide more than just a novelty experience - for them to really work for one or both of you - you’ll probably find that you need to create a rhythm that works. This requires patience, and also communication. If the movement is too fast or slow, let your partner know! If one of you has found the perfect spot, communicate that to the other person. And most importantly, have some fun while you figure out what works for both of you.
Assume the Position
There’s no one right sex position for using a double dildo, and a lot of folks find it helpful to experiment in order to figure out what works for them. Some people find that a scissor-like position works well, although sometimes elbows can get in the way. You may want to try experimenting with different lying and sitting sex positions, in order to figure out what works for you and your partner.
Sometimes When We Touch
Some people don't like double dildos because they feel like they create too much distance between them and their partner. We think that with the right toy and the right position, partners can actually have a lot of physical contact when playing with a double dildo. You can try holding hands while thrusting, using each other’s bodies to leverage movement. You may also find that it works best if one partner controls the motion of the dildo, while the other provides pleasure to other sensitive areas.
Consider The Crescent
We don't generally like to recommend specific toys without knowing more about a customer, but in our many years of double dildo experimentation, we have to say that the curved (crescent-shaped) dildos tend to work better. The straight ones are often cheaper, and we're all for starting on a budget, but curved toys tend to allow for more physical contact between partners, and for more variation in movement and positioning.
Care & Cleaning
Wash your dildo with mild soap and water, and allow it to air dry. If your toy is made of 100% silicone, you can boil it in water or put it on the top rack of the dishwasher to help sanitize it. Different manufacturers recommend different lengths of time, but three to five minutes in boiling water is pretty standard. Silicone is very durable and won't degrade with regular use. However, this type of material, along with jelly rubber, can tear pretty easily, so do keep sharp edges away from these types of toys. If you're using your dildo in a harness, take extra care to make sure it's not forced through the opening. Silicone toys don’t play well with silicone lube, so we recommend using a water-based lube with these types of dildos. As with all toys, condoms are required if you want to share it with another person, or if you want to use it for anal penetration as well as other types of sex play.
Learn about sex toy materials or view our dildos.